Chapter 30

To Lose is to Gain

Without you, my sweet Savior,
I remain in darkness and grief.
Without you, most gentle Lamb,
I remain in worry and fear.
Without you, Son of Almighty God,
I remain in confusion and shame.
For without you I am deprived of all that is good.
Without you I am blind in the dark,
because you are Jesus,
the true Light of the World.

—Blessed John of Alverna

“Whoever loses his life for my sake, will find it.” (Matt. 10:39)  Losses are a part of life.  You lose your health or ability to work.  You lose your boyfriend or girlfriend for some reason.  A friend or family member dies.  These, and so many others, are real and painful losses in life.  What are we to do with them?

“Become good exchangers,” the saints would say.  Exchange something lower for something higher, something good for something better.  Use your loss, which is the cross, as the opportunity to grow closer to God.  “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” (Matt. 5:3)  That empty space is a place for grace.

“Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.” (Luke 1:28)  Pray the “Hail Mary.”  Pray the Rosary.  Pray in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament, if you can.  Go to confession.  Receive Holy Communion.  Lose your life for Jesus Christ and He will fill it.  Watch, view, read or listen to something religious or spiritual from the world of Catholic media, including books. Find other Christians who will pray for you and be of spiritual support to you.  “For where there are two or three gathered together in my Name, there I am in the midst of them.” (Matt. 18:20)  Talk to a spiritual director or Christian friend about your loss, and share with them your particular cross.  God will bless your humility and honesty.  Reach out and love someone else who needs you.  This will give you something to live for and help you to avoid self-pity.

Remember, God loves you more than anyone can.  Cry out to God from the bottom of your heart.  Ask Him to forgive your sin, to take your will and to give you His will in return.  Love Him more than ever before, and give to Him your heart.  He will give you His love in return, and His love is what we were made for.  Praise and thank Him.  Live in the moment where God dwells.  The enemy will try to discourage and defeat you with false fears or to lead you astray with vain imaginings, for he is “the father of lies.” (John 8:44)  Hold on to the way of the cross that leads to freedom, and drive the devil away in the name of Jesus Christ the Lord. The Holy Spirit will help you to follow the new and higher way by giving you the right thoughts and desires.  Let go of the old life for a new one in Christ.